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Jokes about attorneys

A bus load of attorneys were driving down a country road when all of a
sudden the bus ran off the road and crashed into a tree in an old farmer’s
field. The old farmer, after seeing what happened, went over to investigate.
He then proceeded to dig a hole and bury the attorneys.
A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus, and
then asked the old farmer, “Were they all dead?”
The old farmer replied, “Well, some of them said they weren’t, but you
know how them attorneys lie.”

Here is one more joke about burying attorneys alive:
What do you have if three lawyers are buried up to their necks in cement?
Not enough cement.

A man walks into a bar with a crocodile and asks “Do you serve Lawyers
here?”
“We sure do”, the bar tender answered. “Good”, the man says “I’ll have
a beer and my croc will have a lawyer”

 

You’re trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer. Your gun
has only two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the lawyer. Twice.

 

The National Institute of Health has announced that it will no longer be using
rats for medical experiments. In their place, they will use lawyers. They have
given three reasons for this decision:
1. There are now more lawyers than there are rats.
2. The medical researchers don’t become as emotionally attached to the
lawyers as they did to the rats.
3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that rats won’t
do.

 

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